Staff Reports
In the heart of Albuquerque, public transportation took an unexpected turn towards chaos – and not in the way anyone sitting in the back of a bus would ever want. Picture this: people just trying to get to work or grab a taco from their favorite joint, and instead, they find themselves witnessing a scene straight out of a poorly-produced action movie starring extras from the “real life” cast. The bus driver and a disgruntled passenger decided that a simple bus ride wasn’t thrilling enough, resulting in a showdown that could have made even the most seasoned referees throw in the towel.
So, what went down? The driver, likely tired from years of dealing with all kinds of passengers who think their Facebook rants matter more than his entire life experience, ended up having a heated exchange with an older gentleman. The driver stopped the bus, effectively saying, “This isn’t a playground, buddy! Get off or we’re not moving!” Now, one has to ask: was this a Bus Driver 101 class moment or just a misplaced interpretation of “the customer is always right”?
Enter stage left, Raymond Cohen – the knight in not-so-shiny armor who apparently saw himself as the bus hero the passengers didn’t ask for. In a bold move that could be considered, at best, misguided, he decided to step into the fray with the not-so-innovative line, “Sit down and shut up!” Now, it’s never a good idea to get between a bus driver and a passenger, but this guy had the nerve. Spoiler alert: this was not a scene from a superhero flick where courage wins the day. Instead, it led to punches being thrown and pepper spray becoming the new travel accessory.
Now, let’s gift ourselves a moment to picture Cohen’s thought process right before he decided to throw the first punch. “Well, this is the bus; there are clearly no rules here!” It turns out that throwing punches isn’t exactly a part of the public transportation handbook, and when the bus became an arena, the other passengers were less than thrilled. Who wouldn’t be annoyed by a fight breaking out when they were just trying to enjoy their favorite bus ride playlist?
As the fracas unfolded, things took a darker turn when it was revealed that Cohen later ended up in front of a gas station, still trading blows like it was the Olympic Tryouts for stupidity. It’s safe to say that one must not be surprised when conflicts escalate when neither party is prepared for a day job that involves common sense. Ultimately, poor choices multiplied, cops were called, and suddenly everyone was too close to a Hollywood-style ending – the kind that doesn’t usually make it to the happy reel.
By the time the dust settled, the only takeaway seemed to be that public transportation isn’t equipped for boxing matches. One could argue that being a bus driver is a thankless job, where, instead of enjoying the smooth drive to destinations unknown, the driver regularly deals with temperamental passengers who think they’re entitled to act like they’re in a video game scene. As the dust settles on this absurd tale, one has to wonder: could this incident have been avoided with a little more patience and a lot less drama? Probably. But what fun would that be in a world where everyone seems to want a front-row seat to someone else’s meltdown?
