Staff Reports
The Democratic Party is experiencing what can only be described as an epic wake-up call, and it seems to be hitting them harder than a caffeine overdose after a long night of debating. The latest shenanigans from the Lincoln Project crew have shown they’re as relevant as a flip phone in a smartphone world. What’s particularly delicious about this, of course, is the not-so-subtle realization that these self-styled conservatives may have been Trump voters all along. After all, since when do grifters turn down easy money, especially when the ‘grift’ is going out of style?
In what appears to be a backstage pass to their alleged moral superiority, former Lincoln Project co-founders are now trying to present themselves as saviors of the GOP. One can’t help but wonder if their newfound zeal is more about securing another lucrative grift than about actual conservative values. It’s alarming yet amusing to watch this cast of characters scramble for relevancy at a time when real conservatives are rallying behind Trump, ready to bring the house down—not the actual house, of course, just the figurative house of leftist governance.
The reality?
Democrats are realizing they had a better shot with Joe, but decided instead to kick him out in favor of the younger crowd.
Yet still cried "democracy dies in darkness" and threat to democracy while quite literally appointing a new Presidential Elect.
And still…
— Marmilin Voncarstein (@marmilin) November 6, 2024
Meanwhile, President Biden still seems to be obliviously lost in a world of naps and gaffes, raising the question of whether he even remembers who Kamala Harris is when he wakes up. There’s a growing concern—or perhaps a jesting hope—that he may awaken one day and inquire about how much Kamala won by in the recent election. One can almost hear the collective sigh across the nation as they picture him scratching his head in confusion while the rest of America holds its breath.
On a related note, the GOP is standing tall, boasting a statistical advantage in retaining the House. Current projections from the data analyzers maintain an optimistic bubble for the Republicans at a robust 52%. It’s hilarious that this number comes just as more people rejoice in Trump’s continuing popularity, especially among younger voters—perhaps even in places as unlikely as New York City, where he “lost” but seems to have won the hearts of a new generation.
As Trump supporters prepare for what they hope will be a grand victory speech, the underreported losses of off-the-rails Democratic candidates like Deborah Gonzalez—a DA who was more concerned about collateral consequences to undocumented defendants than justice—serve as a stark reminder of what happens when progressives forget their priorities. Her reign of ‘compassionate’ confusion is finally over, exposing the cracks in the Democratic platform and giving conservatives a hearty laugh. The night belongs to those who kept the faith, and the Democrats can only wonder if they’ll ever find their way back from the wilderness of their own making.
