Staff Reports
An ISIS recruiter, who somehow managed to hold a one-way ticket to a life of crime while living in New York, is finally getting a sentence that matches her crimes. After a thoroughly ridiculous initial sentence of just four years—an amount that could barely cover a bad weekend in the Big Apple—Sinmyah Amera Ceasar, a.k.a. “Umm Nutella,” has been slapped with a more appropriate 19-year prison sentence. This latest ruling came courtesy of Brooklyn Federal Court Judge Kiyo Matsumoto, and good luck explaining that one to a judge in any real court.
Initially sentenced in 2019, Ceasar’s brief foray into freedom only lasted 13 months before she decided to try and flee like a soap opera villain, tearing off her ankle monitor in her audacious plot to escape to Russia. Perhaps she thought she could hop on a flight to “ISISland” or whatever deluded vision she had conjured. As if people needed any more evidence that she was unrepentant, federal prosecutors pointed out that she initially tried to tie the knot with a fellow would-be terrorist behind bars, proving love truly knows no bounds—even if it’s for the wrong kind of jihad.
ISIS recruiter known as 'Umm Nutella' sentenced to 19 years in prison. pic.twitter.com/hucPaiDbHq
— Daily Mail Online (@MailOnline) April 11, 2025
With the slap on the wrist she originally received, it appeared that some judges were more interested in playing life coach than actually delivering justice. The late Judge Jack Weinstein had proclaimed that Ceasar needed education and mental health services to be “saved as a human being.” Spoiler alert: ISIS recruiters probably aren’t the best candidates for rehabilitation to society. Turns out, one can’t just sit around and try to “educate” someone who’s determined to spread chaos and violence while sporting a name that raises more eyebrows than a spread on a crepe.
The 2nd US Circuit Court of Appeals recognized how shockingly inadequate that initial sentence was and promptly overruled it, reminding us all just how crucial real justice is. Now, after being reeled back in, Ceasar’s gonna get nearly two decades of uninterrupted thinking time, ideally right in a cell away from Americans who value their safety. It’s the kind of imprisonment that’ll let her ponder the poor decisions that led her to cheer on ISIS instead of enjoying a trivial pursuit of knitting or baking, more appropriate for a moniker like “Mother of Nutella.”
This whole saga reads like a suspense movie gone wrong, where the criminal gets a laugh out of the mockery that the judicial system nearly made of this. The Department of Justice has made it clear that Ceasar’s social media prowess was a key factor in her recruiting efforts, as she enlisted five people to leave their lives in America and march toward battle with ISIS. Good intentions won’t cut it here. It’s about time the judiciary recognized that some terrorists deserve a heavier hand, especially ones with a flair for dramatic exits.
