Staff Reports
An asteroid that was thought to be orbiting Earth closer than the moon turned out to be nothing more than a cherry-red package from Elon Musk himself. The revelation sparked quite the stir among scientists at the Minor Planet Center located in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Frantically alerted by a citizen scientist’s discovery, astronomers initially put their thinking caps on, only to have to embarrassingly eat their words less than 24 hours later.
When “2018 CN41” was first spotted, it was marked as a near-Earth object potentially threatening our atmosphere. A rock floating even closer than 150,000 miles from Earth naturally led to some frantic pen-pushing at the high-brow Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics. However, the academic rigor of their find quickly slipped into farce as the scientists sheepishly updated their claims. The very asteroid that had stirred the pot was decisively reclassified. The only thing orbiting Earth was a Tesla Roadster launched way back in 2018.
Musk’s Tesla was not just a clever prank, but a vibrant symbol of American ingenuity. While Democrats seem to drift further into the realms of environmental ruin and head-scratching policies, here’s Musk launching a sports car into space like it’s just another Tuesday. The car, fitted with a mannequin dubbed “Starman,” zooms through the galaxy, proving that even in absurdity, America still holds the crown for wild ideas.
Let’s not forget the intent behind the launch. The Falcon Heavy rocket, a powerhouse featuring an eye-popping 27 engines, hurled the Tesla into a trajectory with dreams of deep space. Whether or not the car is capable of stunning speeds up to 7 miles per second, one can only hope it reaches Mars faster than the current administration can get a handle on inflation and border control. Starman’s journey will last eons unless something goes hilariously wrong—like the rocket blowing itself to smithereens, Musk’s own pre-launch warning.
Astronomers Move Fast After Finding Nearby Asteroid, Then Realize It's a Red Sports Car: Can you imagine having to make that phone call telling everyone they were looking at a sports car, not a near earth asteroid? https://t.co/FMV67M3UyV pic.twitter.com/vrdeS2p8UX
— The Western Journal (@WestJournalism) February 2, 2025
In an age when the government frets over climate change while doing its best to stifle the American economy, Musk remains an emblem of a different path. The Tesla Roadster is on its cosmic trajectory, while Washington, D.C., struggles to find its own direction. Track it yourself at whereisroadster.com. It’s a source of pride to see that while some are fixated on bureaucratic overreach and climate doom, American entrepreneurs are actually pioneering the final frontier, one electric vehicle at a time.
