Staff Reports
In the whimsical world of politics, few things are as entertaining—and infuriating—as watching the various members of the political elite hold firm to their positions until they don’t. Enter Joe Biden, our esteemed President, who seems to have picked a rather unfortunate moment to embrace the concept of “no one is above the law.” With his son Hunter Biden in the spotlight for numerous shady dealings, the president’s previously unwavering stance on family loyalty has crumbled faster than a soggy piece of bread at a wet picnic.
Here we have President Biden declaring to the world that he would never pardon his son. It was a firm “no” that echoed through press conferences, interviews, and, quite frankly, all the way to the last jelly-filled donut shop in town. But fast forward to what we now know: come December 1, 2024, the announcement rang clear that Hunter would receive a pardon for a glorious eleven years’ worth of alleged infractions—because nothing says accountability quite like a family pardon, right? It’s like watching a magic show where the rabbit doesn’t just disappear; he’s handed a golden ticket instead.
As if that wasn’t enough to keep the irony meter buzzing, let’s consider the White House Press Secretary’s valiant attempts to defend this meandering narrative. During a recent series of press briefings, she was hit with questions that could make even the toughest politician break a sweat. Instead of directly addressing the elephant in the room, she danced around the issue like a contestant in a poor rendition of “Dancing with the Stars,” all while insisting that the president had wrestled with this decision—as if him grappling with the consequences of his actions is some sort of noble craftsmanship.
And let’s be honest: the rhetoric from the Biden administration is rich with flourishes. There’s talk of changing circumstances, the burdens of being a Biden during the age of scrutiny, and a heartfelt yearning for the president’s “belief in” the justice system—except, of course, when it’s his kin under fire. What does that say about the broader ideals he was elected to uphold? A simple question arises: if old Joe can absolve his son with the stroke of a pen, what message does that send about justice in America? That it’s merely a plaything for those in higher office, a gavel that can be silenced when familial ties come into play?
Of course, this whole charade wouldn’t be complete without the predictable press corps responses, akin to a deer caught in the headlights. The exchanges became a compelling real-time drama, with Peter Doocy regularly interrupting the press secretary’s evasive maneuvers. It’s as if he had front-row seats to a grand circus where the clowns were supposedly running the show. While KJP was sweating bullets, attempting to spin those tangled webs of truth (or lack thereof), the audience was cheering for a glimpse of accountability that remained stubbornly out of reach.
What’s truly astonishing is the audacity of it all. The lengths to which the Biden administration goes to uphold a narrative that’s fraying at the edges is a masterclass in hypocrisy. As Roald Dahl said, “A person with ugly thoughts can never be ugly,” and it seems those thoughts have leaked out in this ongoing saga. The idea that the system works for everyone equally just took a nosedive, leaving behind a trail of commiseration for those who thought honesty might still have a place at the table. At the end of the day, folks, it’s a rough and pitiful spectacle we’ve witnessed—a full-dress parade of excuses, deflections, and hollow reassurances that leave us questioning not just the administration but also the very fabric of American justice itself.
So, buckle up, dear reader! We shall continue to observe this ongoing political theatre, popcorn in hand, waiting to see how this tangled yarn unfolds. Will there be a reckoning, or will we be left with yet another spectacle of “do as I say, not as I do”? One can only hope for a better show next season.
