Staff Reports
The University of Michigan’s student council has become a real-life episode of “Survivor: Campus Edition,” where a newly elected pro-Palestinian faction, hilariously dubbed the “Shut it Down” party, has decided to go full-on scorched earth against student funding. This group’s triumphant election victory earlier this year, based on a pledge to defund various student organizations unless the university pulls its financial support from Israel, has sent ripples through the normally tranquil waters of Ann Arbor. The self-appointed champions of this crusade seem to have overlooked one tiny detail: a lot of students want to do more than just protest.
As autumn approaches and students return to campus, the council’s budget, which amounts to a staggering $1.3 million, has been effectively turned into a dry desert for student organizations across the board. From frisbee teams to ballroom dancers, the funding freeze means these groups are suddenly as welcome on campus as a snowstorm in July. The reality is that the university’s regents have remained steadfast, refusing to back a financially reckless divestment from any company that might have ties to the Jewish state or the military-industrial complex.
Pro-Palestinian Student Council at Michigan Defunds Groups Including Student Government https://t.co/vH3bXmaXK8 pic.twitter.com/NpFHkrfbgc
— AntiCorporatism.com (@CorporateState) August 28, 2024
One particularly dramatic flair had Nicolette Kleinhoffer, president of the ballroom dance team, expressing her feelings of “stress.” It seems her team’s hopes of renting space and traveling for competitions are dashed. Meanwhile, Gabriel Scheck, the president of the Ultimate Frisbee team, can’t help but wonder why student government is shooting itself in the foot by denying students access to their own funds. But logic and self-interest appear to have taken a holiday as the “Shut it Down” party continues its protest theatrics.
To add a twist worthy of a soap opera, the council president, Alifa Chowdhury, has reportedly vetoed a budget resolution that was passed unanimously by the assembly, making dramatic statements about the implications of their protest. According to the “Shut it Down” manifesto, they’re not just hindering student projects; they’re delivering a clear message, claiming to represent the majority when only a mere quarter of students bothered to vote for their radical agenda in the first place. The shrill chorus of their grievances echoes, somehow believing that inconveniencing fellow students presents a noble sacrifice.
Some light has emerged from the chaos, as the university administration recently agreed to temporarily fund certain student organizations—on the condition that they would be reimbursed. While some students cheer this move as a commendation for university standards, others are scratching their heads, wondering how the council managed to lose control of the money they claim to represent. Perhaps the most ridiculous takeaway is that while these activists remain resolute, only a small fraction of the student body seems genuinely invested in their cause.
As the academic year kicks off, one can sense a collective student body sigh of frustration. Many, perhaps without even realizing it, apparently suffer from an ailment known as “apathy towards radical activism.” This comes as no surprise when only 25 percent of students gave a hoot enough to cast a ballot in the last election. The bigger question remains whether the cost of protesting feels more like an alien invasion than a well-thought-out strategy among the average Wolverines. Each day that passes with this redirected funding not helping students only inches them closer to proving that the ‘Shut it Down’ party may rely heavily on shutting down everything fun at U of M.
