Biden Baffles Again: Touts Veto Power in Abortion Anniversary Rally

In what seems like a game of political ping-pong, President Joe Biden has once again stepped up to the podium to show off his impressive linguistic gymnastics. In a speech in Manassas, Virginia, just hours before the New Hampshire primary, the 81-year-old leader made it clear that he’s not about to play patty-cake with the GOP front-runner, Donald Trump, or anyone else who dares to challenge him. And what was the focal point of this rally, you ask? Celebrating the 51st anniversary of Roe v. Wade, the Supreme Court decision that made legal abortion the law of the land. And surprise, surprise, Biden promised to veto any national abortion ban that came his way. Well, color me orange and call me a carrot, but this is just the news I wanted to hear on a Tuesday afternoon!

However, it seems our dear president’s words got a bit tangled in the mesh of his verbal acrobatics. The official transcript of the event wasn’t up on the White House website, but according to some eagle-eyed social media hawks, Biden’s message was something along the lines of, “Don’t mess with uhhiminauhwemerica unless you want to get the benefit.” Now, I’m not a betting person, but I’d be willing to put some money down on the confusion this statement caused. I’m offering odds of 3-1 on “the women of America,” 10-1 on “the limit of America,” and a whopping 65-1 on “the a-wim-o-we a-wim-o-we in the jungle unless you want to get the benefit.” It’s like he tried to shoot an arrow at Trump and only hit his own foot.

And if that wasn’t enough, the same speech saw Biden engage in what the media would call “election denial” in any other circumstance. For starters, he just plowed right on through and introduced Terry McAuliffe as Virginia’s “real governor,” completely forgetting that Glenn Youngkin managed to thump McAuliffe in the 2021 race. Boy, are we in for a wild ride with this one.

But hold your horses, because Biden’s day wasn’t all missteps and mix-ups. Though Minnesota Rep. Dean Phillips tried to give old Joe a run for his money in the New Hampshire primary, it seems like his efforts fell just short of the mark. With only around 20% of the vote, Phillips couldn’t quite work the magic to send Biden packin’. In fact, write-ins for Biden and unprocessed write-ins hold the lion’s share of the vote, sitting at just shy of 70%. Looks like Phillips’ plan went up in flames faster than a wet match.

But let’s not forget the burning question on everyone’s mind: Is Biden cognitively impaired? It’s the million-dollar query of our time, and the answer isn’t as clear as a clean window pane. Polls seem to suggest that Americans are giving Biden some serious side-eye, with a significant portion not convinced about his mental acuity. And with numerous instances of gaffes and mix-ups, from forgetting his own Cabinet members to mistaking one Democrat for another, it seems like the president needs a cognitive restoration quicker than a pig needs a mud bath on a hot day.

So, as we gear up for the 2024 election and the race heats up, it looks like the Democrats have a few more hurdles to jump before they reach that proverbial finish line. Will it be a smooth ride for Biden, or are we in for more verbal rollercoasters? Only time—a short 10-plus months, to be exact—will tell. But in the meantime, buckle up, folks. It’s bound to be a bumpy ride!

Written by Staff Reports

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