Democrats Scramble to Replace Biden After Disastrous Debate as Election Looms

The Democratic Party is scrambling to replace President Joe Biden just months before the 2024 election after his disastrous debate performance. The bumbling septuagenarian has left liberals clutching their pearls and panicking over who could possibly take the place of Sleepy Joe to stand a chance against the formidable former President, Donald Trump.

Always quick to overpromise and underdeliver, the Democrats have their usual suspects: Vice President Kamala Harris, everyone’s favorite California calamity Governor Gavin Newsom, and former First Lady Michelle Obama. However, according to insiders within the Biden campaign and the Democratic National Committee (DNC), Harris is the frontrunner.

Great, nothing says “winning strategy” like a candidate with a popularity rating sinking faster than the Titanic. Harris’s approval rating barely reaches 42%, with a whopping 52% disapproval. Even among her own party’s voters, Harris is about as appealing as a tax hike. Most of the voters surveyed aren’t exactly thrilled with the idea of Harris helming the nation, with a significant majority convinced she’d make a lousy president.

So here lies the Democrats’ conundrum: Is a “dead” Biden better than a live Harris in a head-to-head against Trump? Democrat strategist and resident political jester, James Carville bluntly said Harris poses more of a threat to swing voters than a comatose Biden if and when Biden finally throws in the towel, the powers that be will have to back Harris, though that prospect sends shivers down the spine of many a liberal elitist.

High-profile Democrat donors, pearls firmly clutched, are threatening to cut off the money pipeline if Biden isn’t replaced. Some donors are imploring Biden to introspect on whether he can “in good conscience” drag the party to victory. One irritated donor even pointed out that keeping Biden on the ticket practically hands votes to Trump on a silver platter.

But never one to bow to logic or reason, Biden has vowed to cling to his delusions of adequacy, citing polling as his reason. In the meantime, the Democratic Party continues its circus act, frantically looking for a way to unseat an incumbent they themselves seem not to trust. As November looms, expect more hilarity from the left—the GOP can sit back with a bowl of popcorn.

Written by Staff Reports

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